My Dad is a Member of the NRA...

Photo credit: AP | A memorial for shooting victims near Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn. (Dec. 15, 2012)

My dad is a member of the NRA. He was a proud member of the United States Army. He is now a proud veteran. I grew up with over 20 guns in my house, locked away in a safe bearing "The Right to Bear Arms", with an American eagle across it. All of my dad's guns were legal, registered. He never told a soul the combination to the safe, so that no one besides himself would ever have access to it. My siblings and I were taught to shoot safely from a young age, with my dad at our sides. He even convinced me to do a pistol class to get my permit, and although I never followed through with getting the permit or gun, I did take the class to make him happy. He is, by definition, what the U.S. would call the most responsible of gun owners.

We live in Wilton, Connecticut. Before that, my parents lived in New Canaan, Connecticut for over 30 years, which is just under 35 miles from Newtown and Sandy Hook Elementary School where 20 beautiful little children, and seven adults were murdered with high-powered assault weapons.

I cried on and off all weekend. My brothers and sister and I went to public schools in this county, at schools just like this elementary school. I thought of my little brother's bowl cut and chubby face, my sister's bright blue eyes and blond curls when they were six years old. I remember it so well. I was their older sister who loved them so much, and who took care of them. I thought, What if this happened at their elementary school when they were little? What if one of the dead children were them? It could have easily been in my town. It could have easily been in your town.

My siblings and I are grown now, and we want to have children of our own. My sister lives in Scotland, and as we cried over the phone about the massacre of these babies, we said to each other: "This is where we wanted to raise our kids! In these schools! How can this happen? What can we possibly do?" There are many things that lead to these school shootings, and the other shootings in public places that have become so common in the United States. I know well about the trials and tribulations of mental illness, and gaining access to proper health care. This is a major part of the problem. I loathe the violence in video games, and in movies and TV shows that has become so commonplace, and often choose not to watch graphic shows, no matter how "good" they are supposed to be. I do not like to fill my mind with such violent images. It makes me uneasy to think about how many people in this country do fill their minds with such violent images.

But there is only so much we can choose to escape. Our culture is violent, and we are taught that violence is acceptable. As I heard from one person this weekend, violence is actually taught to be the "preferred" method of solving your problems, even at a young age. And it all is so much more complicated than video games and movies, isn't it? Society forces us to adhere to a set of rules in life, be a certain way, and follow a certain path that does not make everyone happy... that does not coincide with everyone's needs and wants. As a society we should stop pushing one path on everyone, and allow people to focus on their mental well-being, their happiness, and their connection with their own souls and spirituality. We, individually, and up to the highest level of our government, need to choose non-violence as the answer, and we have to encourage our children to do the same. All of these things are part of the problem, and I want all these things to be addressed.

However, the most tangible and manageable answer to our problems that I see, which can be enacted quickly, is gun control. Semi-automatic assault rifles, and handguns need to be illegal, as well as high-capacity magazines, and such weapons need to be removed NOW. For people that currently own them, they should be turned in to local law enforcement. Every time a gun is purchased, a background check which includes a mental health check and or examine should be required. No more loopholes! Both the shooter (note: I will not use their names) in Tucson, AZ in which six people were killed and 13 were wounded, including Gabby Giffords, as well as the shooter at Virginia Tech, would not have been eligible to buy guns with proper background checks. They found the loopholes.

“When will we learn to stop fighting fear and violence, with more fear and violence? This will only exacerbate the culture of violence

we are now living in.”

I do not understand, and I will never understand why people would object to such changes. Background checks seem common sense, do they not? And such high-powered weapons serve one purpose and one purpose only: to kill others. On Friday, December 14th, 2012, such weapons led to the deaths of 20 small babies, the names and faces of whom I cannot get out of my mind. Yes, the second amendment allows for the right to bear arms, but do hunting rifles and pistols not suffice? Our founding fathers could not have foreseen these types of weapons being manufactured and sold on such a large scale. They could not have foreseen the mass bloodshed we are enacting on each other with these guns.

To the people who say that we need to stop the person behind the gun, and not the gun itself, I agree that we need to try and help these angry, violent young men who seem to be emerging with more frequency and more ferocity in our society. We must do the best we can to help them, and not ignore them, through a better acceptance and understanding of mental health issues, and through a better health care system. While I know that this will help, there also will always be people who are violent, and want to hurt others. They exist in every society. But when they in exist in our society, the United States, they have easy access to weapons that allow them to kill many people, very quickly. People who want to do such violence are able to do the most harm imaginable. In my opinion, the right to such weapons will never come before the right of our children to be safe in our schools, to be happy and healthy, and to life a long and full life.

Finally, to those who say that the teachers should be armed, I beg of you with a level head to re-think such position. Teachers are teachers for a reason. They are compassionate, and kind, and loving, and want to take care of children. They did not sign up to be police officers, or security guards. They did not sign up to own and shoot guns. I can guarantee the vast majority of them would not feel comfortable being expected to carry a gun in their schools. And most importantly, they should not have to! When will we learn to stop fighting fear and violence, with more fear and violence? This will only exacerbate the culture of violence we are now living in. 

My dad sat with me this weekend while I cried and watched the news. He went to church with me on Sunday, the first time I have been in over seven years. I cried to him and pleaded, "How do I raise my own children today and hope to keep them safe?" He looked at me with so much concern in his eyes. He could see my pain and suffering, and I could also see his. My dad only has one gun left from his collection. My dad called the non-emergency line of our local police today and asked them to pick up his last gun, and to safely take it away.

"Democrats Don't Work"

So there was this comment going around on the day of the election that apparently Tim Tebow said.*  And I am not someone who bows down before Tim Tebow like other people do (for what reason, I still am not sure).  Yes, he does seem like he is a very nice person.  He also doesn't seem like someone who questions pretty much anything he is told by: a. authority, b. his parents, or c. The Bible.  I started questioning all these things as early as it was for me to comprehend I had the ability to, thus why I do not bow before him as if he is the new coming of Christ.  I actually remember thinking when I was young how bizarre having to say the pledge of allegiance every day was.  It's not that I care about what it says, like "under God" or anything, it's more the idea of having young children recite something every day pledging themselves to their nation seems oh-so-naziesque.  Or Communist China.  Or something like.  

Anyways, he apparently said "I'm predicting Obama will take an early lead tomorrow... Until all the Republicans get off work."  People were re-tweeting, posting on facebook, and going out of their way to tell me this like crazy.  I wanted to retort, oh yeah, the Democrats were just savvy enough to go before work.  Or I wanted to simply punch everyone who said that in the face.  I don't think I have ever heard something so disgraceful and offensive.  Quite honestly. 

I cannot believe that people can have the audacity to say that people who vote for democratic candidates don't bother to work.  Oh yeah, we're all bottom-feeders who love to suck all you good ole' working folk dry!  Keep workin' so we can keep takin'!  

Listen, I am not going to lie.  I come from a nice town.  A really nice town.  And almost everyone that I still know from my hometown, (I would say with the exception of a few of my fellow female friends from high school who know exactly what a conservative, tea-party government means for them), lean conservative.  When I hear them say things like this and laugh and joke in this hateful way, it makes me sick to my stomach.  It makes me sick that they would judge people like that.  Especially because the people that they are attempting to judge, they know so little about. 

I have to remind myself that these people grew up in such a different world than most people. They grew up with the obligatory "silver-spoon" in their mouths.  They really did though.  I've seen it.  I've lived it.  They know that they are lucky and from a nice place, and grew up with money.  But they don't realize how that skews their perception of the world.  Hey, let me step back and say that I have met some people from my town that do understand this.  But most people have lived in the top 1% or 10% or whatever for so long, I think they don't quite understand the plight of most Americans.  I also think that I don't even understand it.  But at least I can recognize that. 

Bottom line is you have to take your advantages and you have to recognize them.  You don't have to throw them to the wind, you don't have to disavow them or anything dramatic like that.  But you have to recognize that you have them, and that other's do not.  And to not judge people.  

Oh and also, for all you jackasses who thought that was soooo funny.  You were wrong.  Obama led the whole time.  From the beginning to the end... fucking boo-ya.


* I am informed this was a fake twitter account of Tim Tebow.  No bother.  I have been wanting to say how weird it is I think people are obsessed with him anyways. 

Why I Write

So I need to write a blog.  I need somewhere to put my thoughts and feelings, and the idea of writing to no one seems a little bizarre.  I mean this is what people do now, right?  Write blogs.  I really don't care if anyone actually even reads this (I mean...it would be nice).  But more importantly, I have been writing as long as I can remember.  I wrote poetry when I was 12 years old.  Then after college, I started working and it all stopped.  I don't know why.  I would sit up at night in bed before sleeping and write stuff in my head.  I don't know why I stopped writing it down.  I think I thought, where would I put it?

Anyways, anyone who knows me knows I have a lot to say.  Sometimes, I totally get that it can be annoying.  I also totally get that people don't always feel like listening - especially on Facebook - which I, unfortunately, have taken to to express my feelings about politics, animal rights, etc.  (which, by the way, is what this blog will probably mostly be about).  So here it is.  I am not so good at this whole technology thing for my age, so it may not be the prettiest blog in the world, but it'll do.